This past weekend we talked about having relational margin in your life.  What are some questions you should ask about the people you allow into your inner circle?  Here are some suggestions:

                Are they modeling character qualities you admire?

                Are they going anywhere in their lives at the moment?

                Do they look like they will ever get anywhere in their lives?

                Do they constantly look at the negative and complain?

                Are they always blaming others and refusing responsibility?

 If you can’t answer these in a positive way about the people your friends with, then show them the door.  You don’t have to be mean.  You don’t have to have a superiority attitude.  You don’t have to get emotional.  It is a rational decision.  In light of where you want to go with your life, who do you need to get out of your life? 

 If you’ll make the change, God will bring new friends into your life.  Friends that aren’t out to manipulate you, they want to celebrate you.

You need emotional energy to be kind to someone who is not kind to you.  To really live life with maximum impact you must be careful to observe things that drain you.  If you’re not cautious you will drained down to empty and wonder why you got nothing accomplished today. 

There are certain things that pull from you and it is vital to identify them.  When you don’t know what they are, then your oblivious to the fact that energy and vitality is being sucked right out of you.  What happens is that after about 3, 4, or 5 months, you will find that you are really running on empty.  Before you know it, you are on the edge and you are living a margin-less life.  You are still going to work, church and school, but it’s not enough because of the constant drain on you. 

A marriage going bad, struggles with your kids, finances in a mess, or relationship issues can cause a major drain.  Even though you may not have an immediate answer for these, you must make sure you are replenishing from positive sources. 

What drains me?  Excessive counseling.  When I have to sit and do a lot of counseling, back-to-back, it just drains me.  Some of it is because I feel I take my time to give advice and then people leave my office and do what they want to do anyway.  Also, negative people drain me.  The constant complaining, griping and meandering through life with no desire to succeed.  I get away from these people as fast as I can.  

If God is saying that those are some drains on your life and you are not able to get rid of them right now, then you must be sure that you are having things that fill your tank.  Work it into you schedule so that you keep margins in your life. 

Do you know what your drains are?

What gives you energy?  Another way of stating it is, what causes you to feel juiced about life and ready to go?  Each of us have things that empower us and things that drain us.  There are certain things that drain me, not that they are wrong, but they just drain me.  There are certain activities that pull your emotional energy.  If you have none left, you will not be kind, patient, and understanding. 

So, What are the things that fill you up?  For me, I love worshiping God and engaging with worship music.  I also love my quiet time to pray, meditate and saturate in God’s Word. 

You need to know what fills you up.  It could be fellowship, reading, bike riding, riding your motorcycle, sitting on a park bench, or eating outside (my wife loves that one).  So, what is it for you?  Figure it out, then do it!

It seems like most people in our culture are trying to see how many rights they have.  People make statements like, “Well, it’s my body, so I should be able to do with it as I please.”  Or, “It’s none of your business what I choose to do with my life.”  For most of us Americans that sounds great.  Most people just ask the question, “Is it legal for me to do this?” and if the answer is “yes” then we do as we please.  We think that we should have the freedom to do whatever we choose, but the Apostle Paul gives us another question to ask. 

In today’s reading of the One Year Bible, Paul says we should ask this question, “Is it beneficial and constructive” (1 Corinthians 10:23).  Furthermore, he goes on to add “Does it cause anyone around you to stumble.”  In other words, life isn’t just about you, what pleases you and your desires.  He says you need to consider the impact your decisions make on those around before you do it. 

Sure, you might have the freedom to drink a beer from the fridge at home, but do you want your teenager to drink?  It may be acceptable to wear clothing that exposes half your chest (I’m talking to ladies), but what about how affects those around you?  Paul says, “Yeah, you may have the right to eat what you want, wear what you want, drink what you want, but when you’re around others that could stumble because of it, you need to consider the good of others.” 

Here’s the example: Paul says “Follow me as I follow Christ.”  Hmmm, let’s see did Christ exert His rights, or was His life lived all about others like you and me?  What kind of impact could our lives have if we chose to live that way?

Ever hear anyone say, “Don’t get too close to the edge or you might fall in”?  I never really had to worry about that because I’ve always had a fear of heights.  I’m always careful to give myself margin when it comes to looking over the edge of a cliff, balcony, ledge or anything higher than the third rung on a ladder. 

I can’t tell you how many times I wished I could have been there for people who got to close to the edge in other areas of life, such as affairs, substance addictions, or broken relationships.  Then, because of my knowledge of people, I think, “would they even have paid attention to me if I had been there”?  Maybe, somebody already was there saying, “I wouldn’t go to lunch with him if I were you” or, “I hear that stuff can be really addicting” or, “Perhaps you should think that over some more before you say that.” 

Seems to me the problem is more in ignoring the voices than the lack of them.  Plus, there’s always that voice inside of us isn’t there?  That one that whispers, “I wouldn’t go there if I were you” or “That doesn’t seem like a wise thing to do in your life right now.”  Between our conscience and the voice of the Holy Spirit, you’d think we all would be making better choices - what do you think?   What area of your life do you need to place a line of margin?  

*More on this topic in our weekend series called: MARGIN

There is a single ingredient that I believe makes all the difference in whether your marriage makes it, you recover your health, your wealth or anything else you’ve lost.  It’s the factor that can separate a champion from a player, a winner from a loser, or an excuser from a finisher.  It’s hope.

Hope is something that when you have it, nothing can keep you back.  You cannot be derailed, detoured, or destroyed.  It’s that component that keeps you going when all the others are panting by the side of the road. 

Trouble is, many don’t have it.  They’ve given into self-pity, bad news, negative reports and allowed themselves to believe it can’t be done. 

In Zechariah 9:12 it refers to those who are “prisoners of hope.”  Wow, what a great title to have.  Wouldn’t that be great to be said at your funeral, “They were a prisoner of hope, they just wouldn’t give up.”? 

You can be a prisoner of an awful childhood, poor parenting, bad economy, negative medical reports, dire work conditions, or other horrible conditions, but I want to be known as a “prisoner of hope.”

Being hopeful will do more to turn around your circumstances than anything else I know.  It just recently healed a young girl, nine years old, in our church of cancer.  What could it do for you?

Everyone needs encouragement from time to time and most need it more often than not.  I’m so glad for the encouragement that is found in God’s Word.  In service yesterday, we were discussing the End of the World and how that we don’t need to be discouraged by what is going on around us, but rather encouraged because we know Who is about to return.  Instead of asking, “what is this world coming to?” a better question is “who is coming to this world?” 

In today’s reading of the One Year Bible, I was again reminded of how awesome of a God that we serve in reading the story of Hezekiah.  In 2 Chronicles 32 he encouraged the people with these words, “Do not be afraid or discouraged because of the king of Assyria and the vast army with him, for there is a greater power with us than with him.  With him is only the arm of flesh, but with us is the Lord our God to help us and to fight our battles.”  The Bible says that they people gained confidence from Hezekiah’s words in spite of the odds.

I don’t know what you may be facing and what challenges are before you, but I do know that ”there is a greater power with us” that is able to deliver.  Get ahold of the powerful promises of God’s Word and refuse to give into self-pity, depression, thoughts of defeat and fear.  Instead, gather your thoughts upon the Word of God and hope, strength and courage can fill your heart regardless of what it looks like. 

Read the Bible every day and be on the lookout for words of encouragement.

I had someone ask me about the difference between firstfruits offering and the tithe, so I thought others might be interested as well, so I figured I’d write about it. 

Tithing is a biblical practice of giving to God 10% of your total income.  The practice was instituted before the law of Moses (Abraham tithed) and after when Jesus affirms it (Matt. 23:23).  We actually see that people enjoyed giving above the tithe in the book of Acts when they would sell their homes and bring the money to the apostles as an offering. 

Firstfruits is actually a part of the tithe as well.  It means to offer to God the first of all your crops or produce.  By doing this a person is honoring the God who provided the entirity of their harvest.  When a person tithes off the top of their income, they are providing a firstfruits offering to the Lord.  That means, before paying any bills or spending any of their income, you write out or mail out your tithe check to God. 

When you consider that “the earth is the Lords and everything in it”, then bringing our tithe (10%) shows the generosity of God to allow us to spend the other 90% at our discretion.  He says if we will do this that He will open the floodgates and pour out many incredible blessings upon us while also protecting us from the devourer (Malachi 3). 

I personally believe that I can do more with 90% with God’s blessing than I can with 100% without His blessing.  You simply can’t out-give God and He won’t be in debt to anyone.  This is why we often encourage people at church to try the 90 day challenge of tithing.  Give God 90 days of tithing and see if you don’t feel better about yourself, see God’s hand in your life, and experience unexpected blessings during that time.  I’m not saying put money in and you’ll get money out, but I know that my family has been blessed in many, many ways by our faithful tithing over the years. 

God dares us to try it and see if He can’t prove Himself in our lives in various ways.  So, why not give it a try?  You can’t pay what you don’t owe, so you have to “bring” the tithe with you to the storehouse.  Simply take your total income, and when you get paid write the first check to God’s storehouse (your church) and honor Him with those firstfruits of your income and see if you don’t experience more of Him by walking in obedience.

I wish I was good at everything, but the truth is there are some things I’ll never be good at no matter how hard I try.  For example, I may dream of playing in the NBA, but no matter how hard I train, my chances of being on a team are about zilch.  On the contrary, there are some other things in which I’m pretty good at and could even become great. 

Every leader should discover where their strengths are and where they are not.  A good leader will then begin to develop their strengths and delegate their weakness.  In today’s reading of the One Year Bible, Paul explains this in Romans by comparing each of us a a body part.  Just like many parts come together to form your physical body, likewise we all come together to form one spiritual body (His church).  He further develops this idea by saying that if you have the gift of serving – then by all means serve.  If you have the gift of encouraging – then get out there and encourage someone. 

This principle works in reverse: if you are gifted to encourage then don’t spend the bulk of your time trying to serve because you’re not that good at it.  Plus, someone else around you IS really good at it and wondering why you’re doing it all wrong!  Dare to be what you are, what God created you to be and let others do what they are gifted to do and you do what you are gifted to do. 

Allowing those around you come along side and carry what you were never meant to carry makes you a team player.  Maybe not on the NBA, but for a championship team nonetheless.

One of the biggest questions I hear people struggling with is, “Why is this happening to me?  I’m a good person, so why should I be dealing with this?”  Usually when this question is asked it is in regard to BAD things happening.  Rarely do I hear a person asking, “Why is all this good coming my way?”  Where are the people asking about GOOD things happening to them that are undeserved or unearned? 

Anyway, in today’s reading of the One Year Bible we find a partial answer to this question from the book of Romans.  Here’s the question it raises, “Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?”  In other words, should we believe that if our lives don’t run according to our plan that God doesn’t love us? 

The answer is provided in Romans 8:37 “No, DESPITE all these things, overwhelming victory is OURS through Christ, who loved us.”  Paul says that God already proved His love for us by sending His Son to die for our sins.  What more do you have to do beyond dying for someone to show that you love them?  So, never doubt God’s love. 

The greatest victory that you and I have is not just getting this month’s bills paid, our bodies healed, or a new job.  By far the most phenomenal thing that you and I have to consider is we are bound for an eternal heaven with God and are assured of His presence every day of our lives.  So what if we encounter opposition and difficulties along the way, because when you and I get to heaven we’ll ask, “Why should I get to live in a place like this?  Why me?”  It’s all because of Him!